The Great Sojourn — theNOSTOMANIAC.com

25 - Futile Intrigue (Sumbawa Besar, Sumbawa, Indonesia)

These random encounters are why I pine away for days on the road. Something about those kinds of exchanges that make the world, the people in it, and even I, feel more real, more substantial. The connection. The mutual curiosity. That’s why I was there. That’s why I threw it all away. It’s a drug, and I was addicted. However, my feelings of eating cow brain were slightly more ambivalent. But I had to do it. I just had to. In that moment, I earned a stranger’s respect and trust. I joined his tribe …

Batch 5, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Sumbawa, Sumbawa Besar

26 - Island Cruise (Sumbawa, Indonesia)

The Lonely Planet described the main road as “surfaced all the way and in generally good shape”. Close. Mostly surfaced. The sections that weren’t really weren’t. If I was lazy, I’d describe it as lunar in spots, but I’ve never been to the moon, and the cliché is, well, clichéd. Sections were bad, but they were the exception, not the rule.

Here’s my non-exhaustive list of perceived hazards: Potholes, bigger potholes, rock piles, sand piles, goats, horses, cows, monkeys, chickens, more goats, shadowy…

Batch 5, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Sumbawa

27 - Hey Mister, It’s Election Day! (Bima, Sumbawa, Indonesia)

Destination? Democracy, bitches. I experienced polling station ping pong as I was ferried from one voting depot to another (eight in all). My celebrity status mushroomed, almost atomically one might say. I wasn’t just the center of attention, I was a major distraction, much to the chagrin of polling agents. Pretty sure I made official government-types nervous. Snapping a shitload of photos didn’t help. Voters, on the other hand, were loving it—saying hello, smiling incessantly, demanding I include them. And yet…

Batch 5, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Sumbawa, Bima, Indonesian Elections

28 - Vänskap, Chicken Rants, & Jargon Dance (Labuan Bajo, Flores, Indonesia)

If we could speak to chickens, I assume we’d be able to talk to goats and cows as well. I would certainly treasure their input. Would they blame the chicken for glamorizing an act of potential suicide? I wonder because it’s clear to me goats refuse to be outdone by something as insignificant as a flightless bird. They aren’t content with merely crossing the road. They take it up a notch and linger for as long as possible before relenting. That is, of course, if they relent. There appears to be an elite brand of thrill-seeking goat…

Batch 5, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Flores, Labuan Bajo, Port Moresby

29 - A Dance With Dragons (Komodo National Park, Indonesia)

There have been numerous attacks through the years. (See article below). A month before our arrival, a fisherman was killed and others wounded in an unprovoked assault. Dragons have been known to spice up their diet when watering holes dry up. No water, no prey. Two months earlier, a ranger in the very station where we stood experienced the dragon’s wrath. Allegedly, the cleaning crew left the door to the stilted hut open, so one ascended (probably looking for a snack). When the Ranger Maen sat at his desk and glanced below…

30 - Panic & Pessimism (Komodo National Park, Indonesia)

Our first dive required a furious descent to avoid being swept away. Paddling my balls off to the sea floor was the appetizer. Bottom currents kept the fun alive. Undersea rock climbing, anyone? That was my impression as I grasped for one rock and then another against the flow. It was exhausting, and I was in trouble from the start. The descent took it out of me and I never really caught up to my breath. How can I describe the feeling? Put on a snorkel and mask. Sprint up twelve flights of stairs. Sprinkle in a moderate to severe impending sensation of doom. Breathe normally. Calm the fuck down.…

Batch 6, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Komodo National Park, Castle Rock, Flores, Scuba Diving

31 - Inielika & Wogo (Bajawa, Flores, Indonesia)

Believe it or not, there was a volcano nearby. Weird. Don’t find many of those in Indonesia. Welcome to the Anus of Fire. It’s huge. This one was quiet but had potential. There were eruptions in 1905, 1908, and 2001. The January 2001 eruption spilled lava, charred a few acres, and dusted Bajawa with a light smattering of ash. Inielika is a complex volcano, meaning t has numerous craters spread over 190 sq km. Its highest point is a 1559 km caldera. I’ve never met a volcano that didn’t interest me, so I deemed a visit necessary. I hired a guide for a peek and as a chaperone to an old-school Ngada village…

Batch 6, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Flores, Bajawa, Inielika, Wogo, Papua New Guinea, Ngada people, Ngadu, Bhaga

32 - Mosquito Massacre & The Lost Ferry Of Ende (Flores, Indonesia)

Fine. I knew there was a boat. Definitely. Without a doubt. Ende? Maumere? Somewhere, someway, someday. Ende has a harbor. Harbor equals boats. With this infallible logic as my sword, I soldiered on. Near the harbor entrance were two small shops with signs for the Dharma II and Dharma Recana both leaving from Ende (where I was) to Surabaya (where I almost wanted to be). I inquired inside. Those boats neither leave from nor pass through Ende. Why would they? For that I must go to Maumere. Just to be clear, there were ticket offices manned by personnel not selling tickets to boats…

Batch 6, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Flores, Ende

33 - Kelimutu National Park (Flores, Indonesia)

On that note, the locals believe Kelimutu is, in fact, sacred and inhabited by souls of the departed. I have to admit, souls could do a lot worse. The billeting is portioned by age and measurement on the naughty/nice scale. The forthright souls of youth go to Tiwu Numa Muri Koo Fai (turquoise lake), the righteous aged to Tiwi Ata Mbupu (dark green lake), and the naughty candidates from both groups are destined to spend eternity in Tiwi Ata Polo (black lake). The sign on the trail lacked specifics on age cutoffs and maximum sin allowance, but if I flung myself into the turquoise goo on that day, I’d like to think I had a reasonable chance of making the cut…allegedly…

Batch 6, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Flores, Kelimutu National Park

34 - Very Merry Ferry From Maumere (Flores to Java, Indonesia)

But wait, there’s more. Not all about shitting. It’s also a default rest stop for much of the world. No chair? Pop a squat in Camelot. Prolonged squatting fosters healthy hips by forcing us to exploit a full range of motion. Do this consistently and you’re much less likely to suffer hip pathology over a lifetime. Every bit helps. In our modern bubbles, it’s possible to go weeks or years without ever dropping below parallel. And your body knows. Use it or lose it. Not gonna take advantage? Well then, I’ll tighten here and restrict there to conserve energy. Years pass and we become like the Tin Man sans oil can…

Batch 6, Indonesiaby Mr. Nos T. O'maniacMarch 1, 2020Indonesia, Maumere, Squatty Potty